Such a cant be fucked mood recently. Woke up, couldnt be fucked, went back to sleep, skipped first lesson, went into college, then I finish early on thursdays.
Ate a lot today, not gonna have anything else but what I had was too much. How the fuck do people eat 'normally'? I feel sick right now and I feel like I've eaten an elephant. Probably about.. fuck just counted, 600/700... I can't even remember the last time I ate that much. It's like my strength has just suddenly fucked off. I know how upset and angry I am with myself right now, so I do think I'll be back to normal tomorrow. I have too many scars from when I've been angry with myself, it works, but sometimes I've only realised what I was doing until after. Kind of ironic, I want to make myself look better, I hate everything about me, not just my appearance, but yeah I want to make myself look better, yet I go and scar it. Scars aren't beautiful.
But yea my piano, electric piano same thing, I play so much random shiz and know the first 2 pages of a song or piece and then I just leave it and only play those bits. So my new goal is to play a lot and practise so I can actually get good. I am alright at piano, I'm grade 7, but there's a difference between playing a few grade pieces after learning them for months, and being just natural and doing something well. I love playing, so I want to play properly so that its actually worthwhile listening to.
Sweetheart 600/700 calories really isn't much so don't worry yourself crazy. It won't do you much good.
ReplyDeleteAlso I wish I could play piano! I loveeeeeeeeee listening to different piano pieces but I can't play at all. This is one of my favourite http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZJDNSp1QJA
It wouldn't be bad for some peopl, but for me if I ate that much often, I'd be so huge. :/ Scared about going out tomorrow, I don't want people seeing me until I've at least gone back to looking how I did before :|
ReplyDeleteAw that ones nice :) Yiruma and Ludovico Einadui both do really lovely shiz :)